Have you ever had the feeling that you are not alone. That something or someone is looking out for you? Or that there are forces beyond your understanding guiding you?
I’ve been an artist now for three years. Actually, I’ve been an artist my whole life and never really acknowledged it. It had always come easy to me and I‘d always been one to look for the challenge. If there was difficulty and struggle, I was there. But art?… Too easy for me. Then, about three years ago through the most difficult challenge of my life, I turned to art because it was easy. I’d had enough of “hard”…
As time went on, easy wasn’t good enough. I wanted to be better. And then I wanted to be the best I could be. Well, early on, people began to take note of my work and I began to get requests for more. For the first time ever, I began to see that my hobby might be lucrative. But I wasn’t sure just how to go about turning my sketches into a salary. Or if portraits were the only approach to bringing in a salary. But I was willing to learn as I went along. And I wasn’t above asking God for a little help. Which eventually led me to Kinko’s. I needed prints of my work to sell to potential buyers.
The first time I handed one of my drawings to the woman at the desk, her eyes lit up with delight.
“Did you draw this?” She asked.
I nodded, a bit timidly.
“Wow!” She replied. “A lot of artists come through here. But this is fantastic! Especially since you didn’t trace any of it.”
Well, that had my attention. She then proceeded to tell me how the method of tracing worked and just what kind of money could be made. She also gave me ideas on what type of artwork would sell. And she asked for a few business cards. When I left that day I could definitely state that I’d had complete customer satisfaction.
The next time I returned to have a woman tell me that my talent was a true “gift from God” and that each and everyone of us is given talents that should never be wasted. She couldn’t have known that I had contemplated just how I could use my work to raise money for charity as a thank you to Him for that very gift. It was a confirmation that I was on the right track.
The time after that, I stood at a copy machine thinking about how I could market my artwork when another artist noticed the piece I was copying. He paid me a great compliment then proceeded to tell me about art and craft fairs and how lucrative they were.
And then came the day when I contemplated color portraits. I had been doing black and white ones to that point and had seriously considered going back to school for more training as I thought that people would prefer the ones in color .
I stood in the middle of Kinko’s, reviewing my most recent portraits and trying to decide which prints looked better, when a man came over and asked, “ Is that your work?”
“Yes.” I replied. “But I’m thinking of going back to school for more training.”
“Training?” He laughed. “Don’t waste your time. You’re already better than you know.”
I think I blushed at that. “But I’d really love to do color portraits.” I explained..
“Well,” He responded. “You could certainly do that. But I can tell you that in the long run, most people love the black and white portraits. I’m an artist as well and I’ve been at it a long time. In fact, I have artists working for me. Trust me…Stay with the black and white.”
That particular day I walked out of there with chills running up and down my spine.
Now I was beginning to wonder just what it was about Kinko’s that made me feel like I was having a religious experience. And I realized that every time I’d entered that place , I’d gotten a sign from above as to just what to do next.
Then recently, I was having an issue with letting go of some people that did not belong in my life and someone suggested to me that I call upon Michael the Archangel to help cut the etheric cords that bound me to them. Now I’d heard of angel guides and guardian angels and such, but I’d never heard of “etheric cords”. And at the time this was suggested, I was extremely busy, so I put the suggestion to the back of my mind. Then a few days later, I happened to be in a book store. I had some time to kill and I’d decided to grab a few travel guides for a trip I was planning, then find a nice chair somewhere in the store to plop down in until I needed to get to the next thing on my agenda.
After gathering the travel books, I found a chair in the very back of the place. As I sat down, I realized that right across from me was the Metaphysical section of the bookstore. For some reason my eyes were drawn down to the lowest bookshelf. There on the very bottom was a book on… Michael the Archangel. My senses went to high alert. Why I’d chosen that particular chair I couldn’t really explain but obviously I was being given a message. Quickly I grabbed the book on Michael and discarded the others. As I read about Michael, I began to see just exactly what was meant by etheric cords. And how Michael could give me the “support, courage and confidence” I needed to move on. I decided to then look for other books on angels and I found one in particular that opened my eyes as to just how many times angels had been watching out for me.
And then I realized that I had been listening and watching for them as well, though I hadn’t consciously realized it…From hearing my name whispered upon awakening, to songs that I simply could not get out of my head and conversations overheard by strangers that seemed to have a message just for me. Then, there were the times that I’d turned on the radio or the television to a program with a message that seemed an answer to my prayers. And of course, my dreams, which on some occasions had been downright prophetic and at others quite informative and inspirational.
And there had been other signs as well… Times when a little voice in my head gave me a warning or suggested I do something that put me in the right place at the right time because I’d listened. Like the time my daughter stood too close to the brass enclosure of our fireplace and I told her to immediately step back. It was the moment after she did, that the doors of the enclosure exploded. Then there was the time when something told me to turn around and I ran right into a person who would become a very important part of my life’s journey.
Coincidence? I don’t think so…Not at the frequency at which I’ve had these experiences. In fact, just earlier today as I was pondering just what I wanted to say in this article, I took a time out and turned on the TV. What came on the screen? A program on the History Channel about…ANGELS…
Yes, angels are everywhere. And they want to help you. In the words of August Rush, “All you have to do is listen.” And I, for one, am truly listening….
Subscribe To
Posts
All Comments
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
The Descant Soul...
A few years ago, I joined a forum called the Red Thread and I was curious as to just what exactly was meant by that term. I discovered the Chinese believe that with each child born, there exists an invisible red thread that connects their soul to all the people in their lives, present and future, who will play a role in their life. As they get older the thread shortens and draws them closer to these very special people....What a lovely concept...
I recently wrote a piece on how technology has taken over our lives often at the expense of our humanity. Meaningful experiences and conversation are lost in a quagmire of keywords and phrases bandied about like slogans and sound bites then dropped off the cliff of enlightenment before anything of any substance can be discussed or pursued.
.And so it is with relationships…hooking up, booty calls, friends with benefits have replaced the tradition of courtship and dating, and the social intercourse that allows two people the chance to build a bridge between their souls. And words like soulmate and karma are tossed out to justify even the slightest connection beyond a one night stand.
If you’ve ever truly had the good fortune to find someone that is a soulmate the experience is transcendent. And truly something that you will carry with you for the rest of your life. Again I thought of the red thread between two souls, two hearts, two minds that draws them closer via some karmic pathway, of which they have little, if any, knowledge until they are actually face to face.
Now the question is, if you are fortunate enough to meet a soul mate are you willing to acknowledge it? How many of us muddle through life wondering if anyone out there really hears us? Desire for ultimate emotional fulfillment eventually gives way to the acceptance of mediocrity and acceptance to spiritual lassitude until we become devoid of any real depth and instead choose to anesthetize ourselves with technological and other trivial diversions. The higher call of destiny or karma is drowned out in the din of the “virtual” playgrounds of social networks, or drugs of choice and life’s innumerable checklists and obligations.
But I truly believe that destiny and karma cannot be denied. When something is meant to be it must be acknowledged or the lesson will be forced to be repeated just as history repeats itself. Something of that magnitude changes you forever and once you’ve found that sense of completion you are transformed for better or worse. There simply is no going back.
I have actually met two such people. Both have found their soul mates and ironically both have not been able to answer the call. And it has wrought misery upon both of their lives. They are in a karmic purgatory, held hostage by their fear of something so bright and beautiful they question its very validity. For how could such happiness and bliss possibly exist?
Which brings me to the question of science versus spirituality. Just because something cannot be scientifically proven, does not mean that it does not exist. Have we lost our ability to take a leap of faith? To trust in the unseen and our sixth sense?
Why do we fear true happiness almost more than we fear complete and utter misery? Is it perhaps, because we fear change and would rather live with predictability? Hence, the modern age quest for scientific explanation of every event and phenomenon known to mankind? But more importantly, as emotional beings, do we really desire this? For where truly is the joy of living if not to feel the surprise of your baby smiling up at you or the pleasure of hearing a lover whisper terms of endearment in your ear? The simple truth is: life is messy...a combination of science and faith and constant surprises. And sometimes simply inexplicable...
I would like to believe that maybe we have just simply allowed our inner sense of the universe to become dormant and that perhaps with a bit of a cosmic push,we can allow fate to take its course, submitting to chance and trusting that the universe does know what’s best for us.....
Thursday, March 24, 2011
WHEN YOU BELIEVE...
The other day, I woke up to the sound of rain pelting my windows, and shadows giving my room that mysterious aura of the semiconscious state--that thin veil between reality and dreams. My body however, was on high alert, every prior injury giving me a shout out in one grand role call. My shoulder, in particular, seemed anxious for some recognition.
I wasn’t at all surprised, as I had at one time torn it out of its socket and due to a misdiagnosis, had walked around with it locked in a strange position for months. I pondered this for a moment... The months of sitting around going from one doctor to another, bringing my test results with me and always the same response based on those results. That response? “The test results are negative. There is no permanent damage to the shoulder.”… Then finally, after three months and very much motivated by agony and a shriveling arm, my decision to go to a surgeon to be told an hour later I needed surgery immediately.
I had spent two hours in surgery and I’d needed six months of physical therapy to gain complete use of my arm and shoulder once again. And all because of repeating the same behavior and expecting a different conclusion.
There were so many lessons for me in that experience. First one? Go with your gut. If something doesn’t seem right, it probably isn’t. The second lesson? If you keep getting the same conclusion , perhaps you need a different approach or you need to ask different questions. Last lesson? If you wait around for someone to rescue you, you could wait a very long time. You must take care of and be responsible for yourself and your well being.
Those lessons got me thinking about the law of attraction. I had recently decided to really embrace this concept. Instead of always asking myself why something is happening to me or wishing for a different outcome, I had decided that it was time to manifest my desires. As I got out of bed, I realized that that day was going to be one of my first tests.
I turned on the radio to hear of torrential rain and flooding in the weather forecast. My first inclination was to envision poor visibility, snarled traffic and accidents everywhere. It was almost enough to make me cancel my plans for the day and crawl back under my covers. But I had waited so long for some of the very important appointments I had scheduled that day. And my gut told me another story. “Listen” It whispered. And I did. I listened to the radio while I got dressed and had breakfast. And then I listened some more as I cleaned up. There were no reports of accidents at all. So I put on my jacket, grabbed my car keys and headed out.
Prior to today, I would have plopped myself down into the car, my thoughts preoccupied with the difficulties of driving in the rain. I would have expected to creep along, tense and frustrated at my slow progress. And I would have envisioned long waits at my appointments. In essence, I would have created a very negative environment.
But on this day I decided to try that different approach. The sky was ominous but I visualized how I wanted the day to go…Timely Doctors’ appointments, no traffic delays, and to end the day, a stop at the Mall for the best haircut I’d have to date. Then I put in a CD I hadn’t listened to in a very long time. The music was uplifting with very positive messages. And last but not least, I repeated to myself, “I am going to have a great day!”
I took my time, sang along to the tunes and before long I was moving from one appointment to the next. And though some took longer than others, I took advantage of the wait time by striking up conversations with others who were waiting as well. And I actually became enlightened on a few topics. Soon enough, I was done and on my way to the Mall. Sitting at my hairdresser’s station, I watched as she went to work with an ease I had never seen before. It was probably the fastest haircut I'd ever had. And when she was all finished I had to laugh. For it WAS truly the best haircut she had ever given me.
To make matters even better, on the way home the clouds dissipated and the sun appeared as if out of nowhere, like the sudden glimmer of a flashlight. If I’d never believed in manifesting before, I certainly was a believer now.
So far this is what I have learned…
1) In the words of Yoda, “ Try not. Do... or do not. There is no try…”. And to that end, my mantra has become: “I CAN”.
2) In order to manifest what you want you need to surround yourself with the positive…Uplifting movies, music, books, etc…Positive thoughts are like a whirlpool. They swirl around and around sweeping up more positives as they go.
3) When I begin to have doubts or when I feel negativity creeping in I repeat the following words, “I choose to be happy.” For I truly believe happiness is a choice. Yes, there will be times when sadness cannot be avoided. But I have the choice to submerse myself in it or move past it.
4) I ask myself, “Just what does my Universe look like?” OR “What do I really want?” And then I start creating an environment to welcome all the things I would like to have in my Universe.
5) If something is weighing me down, I need to let it go!…I tell myself that I refuse to let negativity into my space. I try to imagine sweeping my space clean of any cobwebs that clutter it or slow me down.
6) I try to find something to be grateful for everyday even if all I can think of is the fact that I woke up that particular day. So many of the good things in our lives are truly taken for granted.
Now I don’t profess to be any sort of expert on the law of attraction but in the words of William Arthur Ward, “If you can imagine it, you can achieve it; if you can dream it, you can become it.” And I, for one, am truly beginning to believe!
I wasn’t at all surprised, as I had at one time torn it out of its socket and due to a misdiagnosis, had walked around with it locked in a strange position for months. I pondered this for a moment... The months of sitting around going from one doctor to another, bringing my test results with me and always the same response based on those results. That response? “The test results are negative. There is no permanent damage to the shoulder.”… Then finally, after three months and very much motivated by agony and a shriveling arm, my decision to go to a surgeon to be told an hour later I needed surgery immediately.
I had spent two hours in surgery and I’d needed six months of physical therapy to gain complete use of my arm and shoulder once again. And all because of repeating the same behavior and expecting a different conclusion.
There were so many lessons for me in that experience. First one? Go with your gut. If something doesn’t seem right, it probably isn’t. The second lesson? If you keep getting the same conclusion , perhaps you need a different approach or you need to ask different questions. Last lesson? If you wait around for someone to rescue you, you could wait a very long time. You must take care of and be responsible for yourself and your well being.
Those lessons got me thinking about the law of attraction. I had recently decided to really embrace this concept. Instead of always asking myself why something is happening to me or wishing for a different outcome, I had decided that it was time to manifest my desires. As I got out of bed, I realized that that day was going to be one of my first tests.
I turned on the radio to hear of torrential rain and flooding in the weather forecast. My first inclination was to envision poor visibility, snarled traffic and accidents everywhere. It was almost enough to make me cancel my plans for the day and crawl back under my covers. But I had waited so long for some of the very important appointments I had scheduled that day. And my gut told me another story. “Listen” It whispered. And I did. I listened to the radio while I got dressed and had breakfast. And then I listened some more as I cleaned up. There were no reports of accidents at all. So I put on my jacket, grabbed my car keys and headed out.
Prior to today, I would have plopped myself down into the car, my thoughts preoccupied with the difficulties of driving in the rain. I would have expected to creep along, tense and frustrated at my slow progress. And I would have envisioned long waits at my appointments. In essence, I would have created a very negative environment.
But on this day I decided to try that different approach. The sky was ominous but I visualized how I wanted the day to go…Timely Doctors’ appointments, no traffic delays, and to end the day, a stop at the Mall for the best haircut I’d have to date. Then I put in a CD I hadn’t listened to in a very long time. The music was uplifting with very positive messages. And last but not least, I repeated to myself, “I am going to have a great day!”
I took my time, sang along to the tunes and before long I was moving from one appointment to the next. And though some took longer than others, I took advantage of the wait time by striking up conversations with others who were waiting as well. And I actually became enlightened on a few topics. Soon enough, I was done and on my way to the Mall. Sitting at my hairdresser’s station, I watched as she went to work with an ease I had never seen before. It was probably the fastest haircut I'd ever had. And when she was all finished I had to laugh. For it WAS truly the best haircut she had ever given me.
To make matters even better, on the way home the clouds dissipated and the sun appeared as if out of nowhere, like the sudden glimmer of a flashlight. If I’d never believed in manifesting before, I certainly was a believer now.
So far this is what I have learned…
1) In the words of Yoda, “ Try not. Do... or do not. There is no try…”. And to that end, my mantra has become: “I CAN”.
2) In order to manifest what you want you need to surround yourself with the positive…Uplifting movies, music, books, etc…Positive thoughts are like a whirlpool. They swirl around and around sweeping up more positives as they go.
3) When I begin to have doubts or when I feel negativity creeping in I repeat the following words, “I choose to be happy.” For I truly believe happiness is a choice. Yes, there will be times when sadness cannot be avoided. But I have the choice to submerse myself in it or move past it.
4) I ask myself, “Just what does my Universe look like?” OR “What do I really want?” And then I start creating an environment to welcome all the things I would like to have in my Universe.
5) If something is weighing me down, I need to let it go!…I tell myself that I refuse to let negativity into my space. I try to imagine sweeping my space clean of any cobwebs that clutter it or slow me down.
6) I try to find something to be grateful for everyday even if all I can think of is the fact that I woke up that particular day. So many of the good things in our lives are truly taken for granted.
Now I don’t profess to be any sort of expert on the law of attraction but in the words of William Arthur Ward, “If you can imagine it, you can achieve it; if you can dream it, you can become it.” And I, for one, am truly beginning to believe!
Monday, February 21, 2011
Dreaming in Prismacolor
Think of what you’re drawing! I told myself. I had chosen a lotus flower, simply because a very spiritual friend had recently told me that my lotus heart was beginning to open up. It hadn’t been the first time the lotus had been brought to my attention. And so I chose to draw a pink one surrounded by lots of green leaves and shadow.
Now you might be asking yourself, What is the big deal? Well…Up until this point I had only been drawing in black and white--Black and white portraits to be exact. In fact, black and white had become the order of my life. It seemed that for the better part of the past ten years I had lived my life from one crisis to the next…. An endless lists of tasks to be done…Duties and obligations executed with the skill of a surgeon. Color did not seem to be in my vocabulary.
So here I was for the very first time drawing in color. I put my pencil to the paper once again. As I continued to color the petals, I began to see the many nuances not noted upon first glance. And I realized that while my flower was called a pink lotus, it was a combination of many shades that actually formed the whole of the flower…Magenta, Raspberry, Maroon, Red, Terra Cotta and even a tad of Green and White.
Why hadn’t I noticed that upon first inspection? I asked myself. But then I realized that just as that flower had so many facets, so did I. I just hadn’t been able or ready to notice them. I had been going along in life collecting experiences like pennies in a jar without ever stopping to count or inspect them, or perhaps cash them in or trade up to lighten the load.
And then it suddenly occurred to me just what the lotus symbolized. For a lotus is born from the mud and murky waters and rises like a phoenix from the ashes to bloom above the water’s realm, its petals reaching up toward the sun and sky to find the light. It is very much like the spiritual awakening or an evolution of the soul from the depths of materialism and earthly things to enlightenment. And the irony of the pink is that it is reserved for the highest deities and is the earth symbol for Buddha.
Again I thought about the deeper meaning of what I was drawing. My lotus flower was surrounded by green leaves in many shades and layered over each other…Green, the color of resurrection and regeneration. Then I recalled something I had read awhile back about the color green. In Iran it is one of the colors that symbolizes paradise. In Portugal it stands for hope. In Japan, it represents eternal life. That gave me pause.
It was obvious to me now that my subconscious was trying to tell me something as green and pink are also associated with the Heart Chakra. It was a gift to myself as the lotus stands for transformation and rebirth as well. I recalled the conversation about my lotus heart and the manifesting of my heart’s desires. Just what did I want in my Universe? What did my Universe look like? I reflected on this for moment then concluded that as safe as “black and white” seemed, I wanted the shades of gray and the colors as well. I began to feel a bit like Dorothy in her black and white house about to open the door to the whole new world of Oz, a world full of color and strange and exciting new experiences.
What would I find on the other side? I pondered this for a moment, as when all was said and done, all Dorothy had wanted to do while in Oz was return to her home. And her journey down the yellow brick road was filled with danger. A hint of doubt wriggled up. Was I truly ready to move forward? To open up my heart once again to life’s possibilities? To risk disappointment? But then I realized that for better or worse all my experiences of the past had brought me to this point in my life. Each and every one had taught me something. I just needed to figure out the end game…My raison d’etre…
People always seem to argue the merits of destiny and fate controlling your life. They ask what the point of living is if you are predestined to be a certain way or live a certain life. But I believe that at any given moment you are where you are supposed to be. There is a purpose to your life. You just have to discover what it is . Life is a one way journey, each of us on a different path but all destined for “home”--The place where Light and Love welcome us with open arms and Enlightenment completes us.
And Life can be chaotic, unpredictable, multicolored, sometimes streaming like a rainbow and other times swirled and muddled like the bottom of swamp or the inside of a tornado. But oh, when those colors came together in the right combination? Those were the moments that truly transformed you and made your heart sing. And the shades of gray? Well they made you more human, more compassionate, more understanding…
I kept drawing, adding more color, more shades and when I was finished I went back and worked on the finer details. Those small things that gave the drawing depth and definition. And when I was finally done I sat back to look at the whole drawing and thought yes, it was time to take stock of my life…Time to take those pennies out the jar and decide just what to do with them. To put all the pieces together and see the bigger picture. To take all my experiences and fine tune my life’s course, manifesting all that was good and right and letting go of that which no longer served me. To go forward fearless and with the faith that I was headed toward a higher ground.
I put my pencil down, then glanced one last time at my lotus. My heart seemed to swell with an immense sense of joy for the many blessings of the day. And somewhere deep down I had the sense that that night I would be dreaming in color.
Friday, January 21, 2011
ACROSS THE UNIVERSE
A few nights ago, I decided to go stargazing. This was not a momentous occasion, in itself, as I’ve been doing this for years. But on this particular night, I was going to try out my new telescope. It took awhile, as I am much better with philosophy than technology, but finally after several attempts I was able to see the moon in all its celestial splendor. The detail was breathtaking--craters and peaks as crisp as a BluRay DVD, magnificent in magnification. I thought back to the night that one man from Earth stepped out of a spaceship and walked on that Moon back in 1969. I was grinning from ear to ear.
But still, as I folded up the tripod a few moments later, and brought the telescope back into the house, I felt the pull of the night sky. Once again, I headed outside and stood in my backyard, my eyes lifted to the stars. It was cold and I shivered but as is often the case on chilly winter nights, the sky was clear and as lit up as a Christmas tree. I soon forgot the temperature as my spirits lifted as well.
I’d been attracted to the heavens for most of my life, as I believe many are. For me, there is nothing so primal and commanding as the canopy of the stars surrounded by the Earth’s dark shadow of night--That time when a hushed stillness comes over half the planet and the yearnings of the soul come to light--When the voice of your heart becomes louder in the silence that surrounds you.
How many times, I ask myself, have I gazed up at this same sky, looking for answers to the questions of “why”, “if” and “how”, my eyes fixed upon the moon or a bright star, my heart open to whatever the Universe might reveal? Or perhaps, focused upon my life lessons and what I have learned or still need to learn?
People stargaze for different reasons: To try to understand something larger than themselves, for solace--believing that perhaps the stars are a guiding force of guardian angels, to revel in the magnificence of the Creator, or for a scientific explanation of the Universe.
I think of the ancients in Mesopotamia watching the heavens. I get a sense of their excitement as they discover a group of stars that move across the sky and they name them “planets” (Greek for “wanderers”). I imagine them in the warm stillness of the cradle of civilization, observing patterns in the luminescent bodies and creating personas for each and every one. I can hear the Greeks, divining the list of twelve constellations created by the Babylonians into a Zodiac (Greek for “animal circle”). I think of Galileo and his telescope and his first close up of the cosmos…And of Ptolemy, Newton and Einstein looking at the same sky asking the serious questions about space and time.
I can hear Astrologers talk of the power of the stars and their connection to destiny. I recall them speaking of Mercury retrograde, of the recent Moon in Aquarius and the Moon in my Seventh House… Of conjunctions and squares…Of Lunar eclipses…and though I don’t know much of this field, I must agree that there is something above, some power, beyond my comprehension that I reverently acknowledge.
A friend recently told me that “stargazing was a form of prayer.” And as I fix my stare upon Polaris, I would have to agree. When all is said and done, I look to the stars for the deeper meaning of my life. I imagine a force greater than anything on Earth, Ever-Present and All-Knowing, and I pray for strength, wisdom, and the knowledge that I need to move forward and become all that I can be. I think of my ancestors gazing at these same stars and yearning for the very same things that I long for--the health, safety and well-being of themselves and their kin.
I stand there in the dark silence of the night and think of all the people that at this very same point in time are gazing upon this same canvas of celestial bodies--filled with the same hope, despair, longing, dreams and questions that mankind has always held deep within the recesses of the heart and mind and I am filled with a sense of wonderment for the collective unconscious of the human psyche. My hand wraps around the amethyst quartz stone I wear on the chain around my neck and for a moment I close my eyes.
Who, beside me, is looking to these same heavens for Divine answers? Does someone in Canada ask for inspiration? Is there a mother in Haiti praying for healing? An end to her struggles? Is the farmer in Brazil praying for a bountiful harvest? Is a father in Mexico asking for an end to violence? I realize that no matter what I am feeling in the moment, I am not alone and I am comforted. I tighten my grip on the amethyst, take a deep breath and smile.
My feet are steady beneath me, rooted to a living Mother Earth and I understand finally, the power that comes from within--that inexplicable sixth sense that binds us all to each other and to Spirit or the Higher Power of God-- and I realize that I am part of the constellation of humanity bound to planet Earth, a member of a Solar System connected to a Galaxy, melded to a living Universe… ever-moving, expanding, evolving…
I am not alone indeed…
But still, as I folded up the tripod a few moments later, and brought the telescope back into the house, I felt the pull of the night sky. Once again, I headed outside and stood in my backyard, my eyes lifted to the stars. It was cold and I shivered but as is often the case on chilly winter nights, the sky was clear and as lit up as a Christmas tree. I soon forgot the temperature as my spirits lifted as well.
I’d been attracted to the heavens for most of my life, as I believe many are. For me, there is nothing so primal and commanding as the canopy of the stars surrounded by the Earth’s dark shadow of night--That time when a hushed stillness comes over half the planet and the yearnings of the soul come to light--When the voice of your heart becomes louder in the silence that surrounds you.
How many times, I ask myself, have I gazed up at this same sky, looking for answers to the questions of “why”, “if” and “how”, my eyes fixed upon the moon or a bright star, my heart open to whatever the Universe might reveal? Or perhaps, focused upon my life lessons and what I have learned or still need to learn?
People stargaze for different reasons: To try to understand something larger than themselves, for solace--believing that perhaps the stars are a guiding force of guardian angels, to revel in the magnificence of the Creator, or for a scientific explanation of the Universe.
I think of the ancients in Mesopotamia watching the heavens. I get a sense of their excitement as they discover a group of stars that move across the sky and they name them “planets” (Greek for “wanderers”). I imagine them in the warm stillness of the cradle of civilization, observing patterns in the luminescent bodies and creating personas for each and every one. I can hear the Greeks, divining the list of twelve constellations created by the Babylonians into a Zodiac (Greek for “animal circle”). I think of Galileo and his telescope and his first close up of the cosmos…And of Ptolemy, Newton and Einstein looking at the same sky asking the serious questions about space and time.
I can hear Astrologers talk of the power of the stars and their connection to destiny. I recall them speaking of Mercury retrograde, of the recent Moon in Aquarius and the Moon in my Seventh House… Of conjunctions and squares…Of Lunar eclipses…and though I don’t know much of this field, I must agree that there is something above, some power, beyond my comprehension that I reverently acknowledge.
A friend recently told me that “stargazing was a form of prayer.” And as I fix my stare upon Polaris, I would have to agree. When all is said and done, I look to the stars for the deeper meaning of my life. I imagine a force greater than anything on Earth, Ever-Present and All-Knowing, and I pray for strength, wisdom, and the knowledge that I need to move forward and become all that I can be. I think of my ancestors gazing at these same stars and yearning for the very same things that I long for--the health, safety and well-being of themselves and their kin.
I stand there in the dark silence of the night and think of all the people that at this very same point in time are gazing upon this same canvas of celestial bodies--filled with the same hope, despair, longing, dreams and questions that mankind has always held deep within the recesses of the heart and mind and I am filled with a sense of wonderment for the collective unconscious of the human psyche. My hand wraps around the amethyst quartz stone I wear on the chain around my neck and for a moment I close my eyes.
Who, beside me, is looking to these same heavens for Divine answers? Does someone in Canada ask for inspiration? Is there a mother in Haiti praying for healing? An end to her struggles? Is the farmer in Brazil praying for a bountiful harvest? Is a father in Mexico asking for an end to violence? I realize that no matter what I am feeling in the moment, I am not alone and I am comforted. I tighten my grip on the amethyst, take a deep breath and smile.
My feet are steady beneath me, rooted to a living Mother Earth and I understand finally, the power that comes from within--that inexplicable sixth sense that binds us all to each other and to Spirit or the Higher Power of God-- and I realize that I am part of the constellation of humanity bound to planet Earth, a member of a Solar System connected to a Galaxy, melded to a living Universe… ever-moving, expanding, evolving…
I am not alone indeed…
Thursday, December 16, 2010
If These Hands Could Talk
Mary walked into the nail salon as she’d done a dozen times before, took a look around and saw that today was going to be a very busy day. All the pedicure chairs were full and it seemed that every employee was in attendance.
Tina, a very petite Vietnamese girl, looked up from her station and immediately smiled.“Hi Mary!” She said. “You want Fill-In? Pedicure?"
Mary looked down at her wrinkled hands. “Just a Fill-In today, Tina.”
“Pick a color.” Tina swung her head in the direction of the nail polish rack. “I’ll be ready for you in ten minute.”
She said it out of habit, as she knew that Mary liked her nails to look natural and she never used polish. Mary returned the smile then took a seat. As is often the case when a woman is in the company of other women, she felt herself being sized up by some of the other female customers. Though she could have easily thrown on a pair of sweats that day, her upbringing had instilled in her the notion of always looking her best. At times it had caused her problems. And it had saddened her to discover over the years just how many people judged someone on appearance alone. But she had refused to allow others to change who she was or what she believed. She simply looked over, smiled at them and hoped they would smile back.
As she glanced back at Tina, she saw her wave and Mary stood, eager to get on with it as she had a million things to do that day.
When she was settled in her chair, she held out her hands. Tina gave them a careful inspection. Two of Mary’s nails had broken off and her hands looked especially old in the fluorescent glare of the shop‘s lights.
“You work hard?” Tina asked, then laughed.
“Hard enough…” Mary responded. She’d broken them wrapping several Christmas packages for a local charity.
As Tina went about her business Mary leaned back in her chair, her reply still lingering. Hard enough …..Her gaze fell upon her hands. If these hands could talk… She smiled to herself. If they could talk indeed….
“You not working today?” Tina always asked her this.
And her reply was always “No.”
“You lucky…” Tina commented.
Lucky? She asked herself. She often wondered if it hadn’t been more by some sort of cosmic design. Mary hadn’t worked outside the home in eighteen years. Not since her daughter had been one year old. How many times had she heard just how fortunate she was to be able to do this? Probably more times than she could count. Mary would always nod in agreement never telling anyone about the disability that sometimes robbed her of days at a time. She was still grateful though, regardless of the reason, that she had been able to spend those years at home with her children.
As Tina applied new nail tips to her fingers with the broken nails, Mary’s mind wandered back to her younger years. Years of working in labs, her index fingers etched from working with acid, and parched from years of scrubbing glassware. How many jobs had she had over the years? More than she could count on two hands. The thought brought a wry smile to her lips. And an image of her hands always busy…Serving food to patients at the local hospital, tearing off EKG strips for Doctors to inspect in an Intensive Care Unit, putting up sales displays at a Department Store, hauling fifty pound bags of grass seed when she’d worked in a Garden Shop…. And then the more pleasant memory of doling out bridal gowns and veils to anxious brides-to-be when she’d worked in the Bridal Shop. Mary could easily state that she’d never been afraid of work.
“How’s your daughter?” Tina interrupted her flow of thoughts.
“She’s better... Thanks Tina.” All the girls at the salon knew that Mary’s daughter had struggled with an autoimmune disease and then a bout with cancer. It had been a very long tough battle. Annie had always been delicate and then at the age of twelve she had gotten very sick. Mary once again wandered back in time, her mind filled with more images--the bitter and the sweet.
Yes, her hands had many stories to tell…Washing bottles and endless loads of baby clothes…. Patting backs, rubbing tummies, playing peek-a boo, wiping up accidents from the kitchen and bathroom floors…Helping the kids get dressed, making things for school projects,…And then the darker memories…Holding Annie’s hand through all of her medical tests, Doctor’s appointments and surgeries. Hours spent wondering how it all would turn out… And the hardest of all…Placing her hands on her daughter’s shoulders to tell her she’d had cancer…And though Annie was over the worst of it, she still struggled to this day and Mary still took care of her. Yes, staying home had been a blessing.
Tina pulled out her gel powders. “You want pink and white fill-in? And nails shorter?”
Mary nodded. “Yes. Not too long.” Mary had become an artist and a writer in recent years and needed her fingers to be useful as well as “glamorous”…It was another reason for her ever present gratitude of being able to remain at home with the kids. She would never have discovered these talents otherwise. Or that she might be able to actually make a living at doing the things that she loved.
Tina pulled one of Mary’s hands closer and proceeded to fill in each nail bed with pink gel. “You got a party to go to?” It was almost New Year’s Eve and it was a logical assumption.
“Yes, as a matter of fact, I do.” Mary had a wonderful party to attend at a friend’s house. ---A well to do friend whose parties were the talk of the town. Mary traveled in such circles--And a friend whose recommendation of a certain Doctor had once saved her life. Yes, life had given her many blessings.
“You gonna wear something sexy?” Tina asked, quite seriously.
Mary had to resist the urge to laugh. “At my age? Probably not…”
Tina tsked, tsked. “Your age? You still young!!”
At the half century mark, Mary didn’t think so. But truthfully the mirror told another tale for she didn‘t look anything near to her age--Another blessing. Her hands however, told a different story.
Her life hadn’t always been comfortable…Memories came flooding back…Living in welfare housing, trying to repair a hole in the ceiling to keep the roaches out, cleaning up a neighbor’s face after her boyfriend beat her, putting up a tent in her living room when she babysat the neighbor’s son to give him a break from parents who partied way too much, fending off an abusive partner and other images that she fought hard to forget.
And then there was one very distinct memory in great detail…A dozen eggs dropped on the floor--her hands cleaning up the goopy mess with tears streaming down her face--as she was flat broke till the end of the month and she wouldn‘t be able to buy any more food.
But that was all in the past…
Mary hadn’t realized just how much time had passed while she'd gotten lost in past remembrances until Tina smiled then let go of her hands. She looked down at her fingers, now all manicured and pretty, the white tips of the nails glistening. Upon closer inspection she realized that her hands were actually quite lovely. Wrinkled? Yes…But sturdy and capable as well. And with the grace of God perhaps she’d have many more years ahead to make them useful.
“You know, Tina, perhaps I’ll take your advice.” Yes, she’d go out today and buy herself a new dress. Something daring to celebrate her life and all that she had to be grateful for. For after her party, a new business venture awaited-- A wonderful opportunity to promote her artwork. It looked like she was finally on her way to realizing a dream.
“Thanks so much Tina. And I hope you have a wonderful New Year!”
“You, too, Mary!” Tina gave her the warmest of smiles then whispered. “Buy a red dress. You look good in red!”
Mary chuckled then paid the bill and headed out to do her chores.
Later, at home, as she sat down to check her email she found a note from a friend with a request to make a list of NewYear’s Resolutions. She sat for a bit and considered just what exactly it was that she wanted to do with the rest of her life. With her thoughts still focused on her musings of earlier that day, she leaned forward and started to type:
My List of Things To Do Before I Leave Planet Earth
1) To be all that I can be, no matter what circumstances I find myself in.
2) To spread joy, wherever I go, and try to make others smile.
3) To help in any way that I am able to, when the need arises, wherever I may be or with whom.
4) To use my creativity in productive and inspirational ways.
5) To do my best, in whatever way I can, to ensure that children will not have to suffer unfairly or unnecessarily, in any way, shape or form.
6) To try to spend what's left of my life savoring the little things...
7) To learn to be happy with what I have, even if it doesn't seem like my fair share...
8) To learn to accept my limitations and love myself no matter how inept or useless I may feel at times...
9) To learn to trust others and lean on them if they offer help.
10)To accept that there will always be people who will judge me and who will never understand my hardships and to not allow them to rob me of my joy.
With that completed, she sat back and gazed down at her now pampered hands. Yes, Mary thought, if these hands could talk they would raise themselves to the heavens and say, “ Thank you! For the many opportunities you have brought this way. For they have made us what we are today.” And then, they would get ready to reach out in faith, to do whatever was right and necessary, knowing that whatever the future brought, things would be as they should be.
And she wouldn’t have it any other way…
* * * * * *
May the New Year bring each and every one of you blessings in abundance and may you never forget all that you have to be thankful for!
Happy New Year…
Tina, a very petite Vietnamese girl, looked up from her station and immediately smiled.“Hi Mary!” She said. “You want Fill-In? Pedicure?"
Mary looked down at her wrinkled hands. “Just a Fill-In today, Tina.”
“Pick a color.” Tina swung her head in the direction of the nail polish rack. “I’ll be ready for you in ten minute.”
She said it out of habit, as she knew that Mary liked her nails to look natural and she never used polish. Mary returned the smile then took a seat. As is often the case when a woman is in the company of other women, she felt herself being sized up by some of the other female customers. Though she could have easily thrown on a pair of sweats that day, her upbringing had instilled in her the notion of always looking her best. At times it had caused her problems. And it had saddened her to discover over the years just how many people judged someone on appearance alone. But she had refused to allow others to change who she was or what she believed. She simply looked over, smiled at them and hoped they would smile back.
As she glanced back at Tina, she saw her wave and Mary stood, eager to get on with it as she had a million things to do that day.
When she was settled in her chair, she held out her hands. Tina gave them a careful inspection. Two of Mary’s nails had broken off and her hands looked especially old in the fluorescent glare of the shop‘s lights.
“You work hard?” Tina asked, then laughed.
“Hard enough…” Mary responded. She’d broken them wrapping several Christmas packages for a local charity.
As Tina went about her business Mary leaned back in her chair, her reply still lingering. Hard enough …..Her gaze fell upon her hands. If these hands could talk… She smiled to herself. If they could talk indeed….
“You not working today?” Tina always asked her this.
And her reply was always “No.”
“You lucky…” Tina commented.
Lucky? She asked herself. She often wondered if it hadn’t been more by some sort of cosmic design. Mary hadn’t worked outside the home in eighteen years. Not since her daughter had been one year old. How many times had she heard just how fortunate she was to be able to do this? Probably more times than she could count. Mary would always nod in agreement never telling anyone about the disability that sometimes robbed her of days at a time. She was still grateful though, regardless of the reason, that she had been able to spend those years at home with her children.
As Tina applied new nail tips to her fingers with the broken nails, Mary’s mind wandered back to her younger years. Years of working in labs, her index fingers etched from working with acid, and parched from years of scrubbing glassware. How many jobs had she had over the years? More than she could count on two hands. The thought brought a wry smile to her lips. And an image of her hands always busy…Serving food to patients at the local hospital, tearing off EKG strips for Doctors to inspect in an Intensive Care Unit, putting up sales displays at a Department Store, hauling fifty pound bags of grass seed when she’d worked in a Garden Shop…. And then the more pleasant memory of doling out bridal gowns and veils to anxious brides-to-be when she’d worked in the Bridal Shop. Mary could easily state that she’d never been afraid of work.
“How’s your daughter?” Tina interrupted her flow of thoughts.
“She’s better... Thanks Tina.” All the girls at the salon knew that Mary’s daughter had struggled with an autoimmune disease and then a bout with cancer. It had been a very long tough battle. Annie had always been delicate and then at the age of twelve she had gotten very sick. Mary once again wandered back in time, her mind filled with more images--the bitter and the sweet.
Yes, her hands had many stories to tell…Washing bottles and endless loads of baby clothes…. Patting backs, rubbing tummies, playing peek-a boo, wiping up accidents from the kitchen and bathroom floors…Helping the kids get dressed, making things for school projects,…And then the darker memories…Holding Annie’s hand through all of her medical tests, Doctor’s appointments and surgeries. Hours spent wondering how it all would turn out… And the hardest of all…Placing her hands on her daughter’s shoulders to tell her she’d had cancer…And though Annie was over the worst of it, she still struggled to this day and Mary still took care of her. Yes, staying home had been a blessing.
Tina pulled out her gel powders. “You want pink and white fill-in? And nails shorter?”
Mary nodded. “Yes. Not too long.” Mary had become an artist and a writer in recent years and needed her fingers to be useful as well as “glamorous”…It was another reason for her ever present gratitude of being able to remain at home with the kids. She would never have discovered these talents otherwise. Or that she might be able to actually make a living at doing the things that she loved.
Tina pulled one of Mary’s hands closer and proceeded to fill in each nail bed with pink gel. “You got a party to go to?” It was almost New Year’s Eve and it was a logical assumption.
“Yes, as a matter of fact, I do.” Mary had a wonderful party to attend at a friend’s house. ---A well to do friend whose parties were the talk of the town. Mary traveled in such circles--And a friend whose recommendation of a certain Doctor had once saved her life. Yes, life had given her many blessings.
“You gonna wear something sexy?” Tina asked, quite seriously.
Mary had to resist the urge to laugh. “At my age? Probably not…”
Tina tsked, tsked. “Your age? You still young!!”
At the half century mark, Mary didn’t think so. But truthfully the mirror told another tale for she didn‘t look anything near to her age--Another blessing. Her hands however, told a different story.
Her life hadn’t always been comfortable…Memories came flooding back…Living in welfare housing, trying to repair a hole in the ceiling to keep the roaches out, cleaning up a neighbor’s face after her boyfriend beat her, putting up a tent in her living room when she babysat the neighbor’s son to give him a break from parents who partied way too much, fending off an abusive partner and other images that she fought hard to forget.
And then there was one very distinct memory in great detail…A dozen eggs dropped on the floor--her hands cleaning up the goopy mess with tears streaming down her face--as she was flat broke till the end of the month and she wouldn‘t be able to buy any more food.
But that was all in the past…
Mary hadn’t realized just how much time had passed while she'd gotten lost in past remembrances until Tina smiled then let go of her hands. She looked down at her fingers, now all manicured and pretty, the white tips of the nails glistening. Upon closer inspection she realized that her hands were actually quite lovely. Wrinkled? Yes…But sturdy and capable as well. And with the grace of God perhaps she’d have many more years ahead to make them useful.
“You know, Tina, perhaps I’ll take your advice.” Yes, she’d go out today and buy herself a new dress. Something daring to celebrate her life and all that she had to be grateful for. For after her party, a new business venture awaited-- A wonderful opportunity to promote her artwork. It looked like she was finally on her way to realizing a dream.
“Thanks so much Tina. And I hope you have a wonderful New Year!”
“You, too, Mary!” Tina gave her the warmest of smiles then whispered. “Buy a red dress. You look good in red!”
Mary chuckled then paid the bill and headed out to do her chores.
Later, at home, as she sat down to check her email she found a note from a friend with a request to make a list of NewYear’s Resolutions. She sat for a bit and considered just what exactly it was that she wanted to do with the rest of her life. With her thoughts still focused on her musings of earlier that day, she leaned forward and started to type:
My List of Things To Do Before I Leave Planet Earth
1) To be all that I can be, no matter what circumstances I find myself in.
2) To spread joy, wherever I go, and try to make others smile.
3) To help in any way that I am able to, when the need arises, wherever I may be or with whom.
4) To use my creativity in productive and inspirational ways.
5) To do my best, in whatever way I can, to ensure that children will not have to suffer unfairly or unnecessarily, in any way, shape or form.
6) To try to spend what's left of my life savoring the little things...
7) To learn to be happy with what I have, even if it doesn't seem like my fair share...
8) To learn to accept my limitations and love myself no matter how inept or useless I may feel at times...
9) To learn to trust others and lean on them if they offer help.
10)To accept that there will always be people who will judge me and who will never understand my hardships and to not allow them to rob me of my joy.
With that completed, she sat back and gazed down at her now pampered hands. Yes, Mary thought, if these hands could talk they would raise themselves to the heavens and say, “ Thank you! For the many opportunities you have brought this way. For they have made us what we are today.” And then, they would get ready to reach out in faith, to do whatever was right and necessary, knowing that whatever the future brought, things would be as they should be.
And she wouldn’t have it any other way…
* * * * * *
May the New Year bring each and every one of you blessings in abundance and may you never forget all that you have to be thankful for!
Happy New Year…
Friday, December 10, 2010
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
I found this online and thought I'd share it with you...
Try to keep in mind the following:
-if you have woken up this morning feeling healthy, you are luckier than 500 million people that will not wake up the next morning
-if you have never experienced the fear of war, loneliness, incarceration, the agony of torture, hunger, you are in a better position than 500 million people in the world
-if you can enter a church freely, without threats, or the fear of getting arrested or discriminated against, you are luckier than 3 billion people on the planet
-if you have food in the refrigerator, clothes on your body, roof over your head, a place to sleep in, you are richer than 75% of inhabitants of this planet
-if you have money in the bank, your wallet, or change somewhere in some box, you are among 8% of well-to-do people
-if you have parents, and are still married, you belong in a rare group of people
-if you can read this text, you are not among 2 billion people who cannot read
Somebody said once: work as if you do not need money, love as if you have never suffered, dance as if nobody is watching you and sing as if nobody is listening.
Live as if Heaven is on Earth. And when you read this know that somebody is thinking of you and that you are not alone.....
Try to keep in mind the following:
-if you have woken up this morning feeling healthy, you are luckier than 500 million people that will not wake up the next morning
-if you have never experienced the fear of war, loneliness, incarceration, the agony of torture, hunger, you are in a better position than 500 million people in the world
-if you can enter a church freely, without threats, or the fear of getting arrested or discriminated against, you are luckier than 3 billion people on the planet
-if you have food in the refrigerator, clothes on your body, roof over your head, a place to sleep in, you are richer than 75% of inhabitants of this planet
-if you have money in the bank, your wallet, or change somewhere in some box, you are among 8% of well-to-do people
-if you have parents, and are still married, you belong in a rare group of people
-if you can read this text, you are not among 2 billion people who cannot read
Somebody said once: work as if you do not need money, love as if you have never suffered, dance as if nobody is watching you and sing as if nobody is listening.
Live as if Heaven is on Earth. And when you read this know that somebody is thinking of you and that you are not alone.....
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)